KayzCorner

It's the holidays, that means beautiful Christmas lights everywhere, slightly annoying Christmas music, tasty food, a higher degree of human interaction, and memories. Now, I may sound like a bit of a Scrooge at points there, but I really do like the holiday, I just tend not to feel exceptionally happy around the holidays. I am a huge believer in the duality of human emotions, mental framing, and that in general one can feel both sad and happy at the same time at points without either emotion ruining the other; but during the holidays, while I feel happy, most of the time it feels dull and I find myself realizing at points when I should be really happy that I am really not.    These feelings of sadness can be attributed to a number of things: First of all,  I have social anxiety and during the holidays I have to interact with more people and stores are generally more crowded. Also, I live in a state that seems to be under a perpetual gray blanket during the wint...

I spend a great deal of time on the internet and as I am on it quite often what I’ve discovered is that the internet seems to be obsessed with is discovering every single dirty secret a person might have, exposing them, and holding it over their heads. Someone is uninformed and accidentally says something offensive, the internet automatically jumps on them acting as though they committed some unforgivable crime. I think we are sometimes really tough on people, we jump on every fault we see. Why do people do this, does it make us feel better about ourselves? As I am an extremely defensive person who sometimes does not respond well to criticism, I thought it would be prudent to be open and honest early on; So, before this gets too far, I want to confess…I’m problematic. I’m not vegan, which some people would claim is problematic in and of itself, and I’m not really vegetarian either and while some people may claim that that is horrible and promotes animal cruelty, I’ve never conside...

When I was younger, one of my high school teachers had a small, framed motivational poster that read “Experience is the best teacher, but the tuition is costly,” for some reason or another that always struck me. At first looking at it made me annoyed, I thought it just another one of those quotes claiming that younger people know absolutely nothing and older, more experienced individuals knew everything. As a teenager, nothing was more irritating than individual looking down on you and minimizing your abilities due to your age; however, as time went on I realized that it didn’t necessarily mean that. My older sister died in a car accident in October of my senior year of high school. She had been my life line and I felt completely lost without her; to be honest, sometimes I still feel lost without her. We had both struggled with mental health issues in high school we understood each other in a way that most of the people around us were unable to. We lived in the same house, experi...

So, I’ve had the wonderful experience of getting my computer repaired the past two weeks… this is the second time in the span of 3 months and I’ve had this computer for less than a year, needless to say, I am not pleased. As it is, right now I’ve been looking for a job, which has been a bit of a pain, but I’m not going to complain too much. I just want to find something that will make me more competitive when applying for grad school. Right now, I kind of feel as though I’m in a state of limbo, I’ve graduated and I thought I’d be happier about it, but instead, I just feel like I’ve stepped off the edge of a cliff into a void of some unknown depth. I realize that this sounds pretty cliché, but I guess the whole idea of graduating and being thrust into life just reminded me that I really have no idea what I’m doing with my life or where I am going. I graduated with a good GPA, but it still all feels rather pointless. I suppose it may just be the good old existential crisis, anxiety, an...